Friday, May 29, 2009

Musings from the Mat

Went to a grueling/satisfying yoga class tonight. But it was good! More about that in a minute because right now I have got to share with you my own personal epiphany from the mat this evening!

This happens to me a lot in yoga class. I'm on my mat and bam! I get hit with a lesson. I have a moment of so clearly experiencing the metaphor between yoga and life. This is when I start wondering if it would be too disruptive for me to get up and grab a pen and paper from my purse so I can jot down my discovery. Have never actually done that, but I think about it often...

So tonight I'm doing my yoga and the teacher cues us to hold our spinal balance for what feels like forever and I find myself struggling and thinking "I can't, I'm not strong enough" or something similar to that. Then I hear this tiny voice in my head say, "Just push through it!" And I know I can just push through it, because I have done that many times before. But this time something clicks and I think, "but wait...that is the opposite of yoga! Yoga is about staying present, even through the hard stuff." Then of course I realize this is exactly what has been going on for me lately (I tried to describe it here) - I have been pushing through, just trying to get things done, disconnecting from it all. So tonight on my mat I worked to stay present, even through the hard stuff.

And there was some hard stuff! Let me tell you we sat in Hero Pose for the first 15 minutes of the practice and when I finally wiggled my way out of it my feet and legs were completely numb/asleep, which really freaked me out. I felt like I was going to cry. It was not pretty. And this was before my profound realization about staying present! All I was doing was glaring at the teacher wondering why she was punishing us...but once I had my moment in spinal balance a few minutes later I was able to appreciate the challenge :-)

Image from

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Postponing pleasure for the "right time"

"There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way." ~ The Buddha

I love this quote and I rely on it when I find myself in the kind of place I'm in right now. The place where I feel so focused on a task/deadline that I'm forgetting to just enjoy the process as I get there.

I'm so focused on preparing for my licensure exam on June 16. In a way it feels good. Comforting almost. To just focus on this one thing, day in and day out. I'm the type of person that relieves anxiety by over-preparing. So I'm studying and studying and studying. And I'm feeling pretty good about the test.

But I'm also finding myself skimping on my self-care. I skipped my yoga class last week. I have virtually abandoned my journal. I haven't even been reading my favorite blogs. I just feel very uninspired and it bugs me. I also hear myself thinking/saying everything will be great after June 16 when the test is over. I try to avoid thinking like that because I know there is always some other deadline or task waiting once I finish this one. Also, I don't believe in postponing pleasure until things are "just right" or everything on my to-do list is accomplished. Mostly because there isn't a perfect time for anything. Or a different way of saying it is that it is always the perfect time, including right now. Also, has anyone ever actually experienced an entirely completed to-do list with nothing else needing to be done? Not me.

I'm feeling such a struggle between working toward my goal and just being content in the moment. Deep down I know that taking a break and doing something for myself will actually make me more productive. It is what I try to convey through my work with others, but I still struggle to apply it to myself sometimes.

So what advice would I give to a client? Probably to just do it; just offer loving and joyful acceptance to herself exactly as she is right now, carve out some time to do something she loves (regardless of how jam-packed the schedule seems), and see what happens. I guess I will have to try out my own advice :-)

PS Today is my grandparents 54th Wedding Anniversary! Isn't that amazing? Happy Anniversary Mimi & Papa!!!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

blogger guilt

oh my goodness.....i cannot believe it has been 13 days since i last posted!!!! sorry :-(

i am feeling majorly guilty...and like i should have some amazing post to compensate for my lack of posting... ugh...pressure...i'm afraid i don't have anything extraordinary...

how did this happen? i guess i've just been so focused on studying for my licensure exam (have a date now: june 16th at noon, please send good thoughts) and preparing to leave my job at UB.

let's see what else has been going on... i attended my first black-tie event in recent memory (ever?) and donned an up-do crafted by my multi-talented sister! thoroughly enjoyed the fruit and cheese selection, as well as the martini bar (rare indulgence, but i do love me an occasional martini).

last weekend we celebrated my hubby's 30th birthday with a fabulous party - very fun!!! he and i also decided to book a trip back to sonoma, california to relive our honeymoon (yes, we know it was only last year, but it has been an intense year!).

i also "graduated" from my entrepreneur program at NCCC last wednesday. hubby and i celebrated by watching the lost season finale and (of course) enjoying a glass of red wine. there may have been brie involved as well...

what else? i've been teaching adult yoga twice a week and kids yoga once a week. (sidebar: have i mentioned how completely grateful i am that i can write that sentence?) there has been a lot of stepping back and feeling totally in awe and thankful for my life these last few weeks as well. i think the reality is setting in a little that i am actually (as my bff would say) "living the dream!" speaking of, the women's wellness circle is so freaking amazing!!!!! and i don't mean me and the concept or whatever; i mean the women and the process of it all! i feel so honored each time we meet to witness the changes, the openings, the transformations that the women are experiencing and sharing. love it, love it, love it! looking forward to many more :-)

so things have been busy, but good! hope you all have also been doing well!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

A Quick Pick-Me-Up

I seem to need a lot of pick-me-up's lately...

My favorite big just-for-me treats are a massage, facial, and/or pedicure; an hour alone in a bookstore or outside or reading; laying on a beach. I could go on, but this post is about quick treats :-)

A quick pick-me-up is something that I can easily do/get without an enormous interruption of my schedule or lots of pre-planning. Here are some of my favorites:

* soy chai latte (never fails to please)
* doing something nice for someone (really does make me feel good)
* catching up on my favorite blogs (too many to name here)
* closing my eyes and taking a deep breath or two
* looking at my wedding pictures (yes, I do this repeatedly)
* taking a 5 minute walk
* spritzing myself with an aromatherapy spray
* doing 1 yoga pose
* reading for 5 minutes (although sometimes it is hard to stop)
* journaling for a few minutes
* emailing a friend
* check in on my family on glubble
* catch up with facebook
* listen to a pick-me-up song ( I am loving I Like Giants by Kimya Dawson)

The little things seriously do mean a lot! So considering taking a few minutes each day for one of your favorite quick pick-me-ups!